I was apprehensive when Mum lured me into the cage two weeks ago and piled me into the car. I like exploring the car when it’s switched off but I don’t like being in the cage thing in a moving car making strange car noises. You see, you never know where you’re going to end up — sometimes you could end up at the hospital where they stick needles in you ans so other unmentionable things — some I still haven’t retained my dignity from.
This time Mum drove for a long time. After about 20 minutes, I realised that yarking wasn’t going to make the car stop so I settled down and resigned myself to my fate.
Finally we stopped and she carried my cage out of the car, told me we were at Carlyn Park Cattery and introduced me to a lady named Heather.
Carlyn Park? Now I’m pretty sure from the research I’ve been doing on the net that a lot of mental asylums end with ‘Park’. So I was quickly sussing the place out for padded walls, straightjackets, little tablets that they say are good for you (as if!), and more needles.
Heather showed us to my holiday room. Well I never! It had hot pink curtains like they thought I was some kind of prissy girly cat. I was already suffering the indignity of having some of my private parts removed the week before, and they expected me to sleep in Barbie’s bedroom. It would have been half okay if it had’ve come with Barbie’s convertible but there were no signs of fun transport in sight. However, the room did have cool features. A huge scratching post as big as a tree, a chair with a (hot pink!) cushion, a very comfy bed, and a ramp that led up to an upstairs area with a window view.
Then I met my neighbour Mog. He growled at me through the wire, but I knew eventually he’d come around and we’d be the best of mates. If I can charm Lou the dog, I can charm anyone.
Then Mum left. I was a little sad to see her go but I had so much new stuff to explore and new cats to meet that I was quickly distracted.
Mum was gone for 10 days and I had the best holiday a cat could ever want.
Heather sensed my indignation and changed the curtains and cushions is my room from Barbie pink to yellow, and Mog and I became best mates. With adjoining rooms, it was very easy to drop in for cat chat. Then we would tear down the corridor together and outside to the enclosed (drats!) but fabulous play area.
I tested my agility and circus skills by leaping from the trees to the hanging baskets, where I could swing in the sunshine. I amazed all the other cats and Heather with my prowess – she said I’m the first kitty to do that. I even demonstrated my party trick for Mum when she came to pick me up.
When I wasn’t surveying my domain from high up in the tree or the basket, I would play chasies with Mog and Peanut, and have a wrestle on the lawn. I loved playing with Peanut because he was a bit smaller than me.
When I needed a bit of a cat nap to recharge my energy, I chilled out on the table or chair.
Well, Mum thought I might forget about her laptop while I was on holidays but it turns out that Heather has a laptop too, and I had to show her how I got my name. We took turns sitting on Heather’s keyboard. What more could I ask for? Playmates, trees to climb and a laptop. Kitty paradise!
Heather emailed some photos of me and my new friends to Mum so she wouldn’t fret. Mum said it was like getting a postcard from me, though I didn’t say ‘wish you were here’ because I knew Mum wouldn’t like sleeping on the floor of my new hotel room, because she wouldn’t fit in the bed.
I spent some time in the lounge room watching TV and playing in the cat tunnel. It was almost like home. But instead of Mum for company, I had feline friends. Chasing someone else’s tail is always more fun than chasing your own.
And just when I thought I was going to stay at Carlyn Park forever, Mum turned up. On noes! I didn’t want to leave so I ran down the corridor to show her the play area. I introduced her to Mog and Peanut and the one-eyed tom. I showed her how good I am at climbing trees (maybe she’ll let me climb those really tall trees at home) and I ran around like a crazy cat.
Then it was time to say goodbye to Mog and Peanut, say goodbye to Heather and go home.
I enjoyed my holiday and Mum says she’s already made another booking for August. Something to look forward to. But as Dorothy says ‘there’s no place like home’ but Carlyn Park Cattery is my home away from home.